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34 Engineering Jokes That Cause Mass Laughter!

Looking for some high-tech hilarity? Check out these super-smart engineering jokes and draw up some blueprints for belly laughs!

There's a lot of different types on engineering - electrical, software, civil, mechanical... but whatever type is your favourite you're sure to have a chuckle at these terrifically technical engineering jokes! So get your duct tape and your soldering iron, and prepare to LOL!

If these engineering gags aren't your cup of tea we've got physics jokes, computer science jokes, and for something totally different - hippo jokes! Jokes for everyone! And you can always visit our main jokes page for a random selection! Phew ok, now - back to those engineering gags!

What do nuclear engineers like to eat?

Fission chips!

Wind turbine 1: "What kind of music do you like?"

Wind turbine 2:  "I'm a big metal fan!"

What did the electrical engineer say when he got shocked?

That hertz!

1st Engineer: “I bet you can’t name two things that can hold water"

2nd Engineer: “Well, dam!”

An engineer installed a powerful motor in the moving stairway

That escalated quickly!

An electrical engineer built a house entirely out of resistors

The welcome mat said Ohm Sweet Ohm!

What's the main difference between Mechanical and Civil Engineers?

Mechanical Engineers build weapons, Civil Engineers build targets!

What do you call an Engineer who doesn’t know how to use a calculator?

A project manager!

Where do software engineers moor their boats?

In Google Docs!

What’s a computer engineer’s favorite snack?

Microchips!

Crisps prank

Why was the software engineer so poor?

Because she used up all her cache!

Why was the engineer fired from her keyboard factory job?

Because she wasn't doing enough shifts!

I passed my genetic engineering exam, with flying koalas

Am I over Koalafied?

What kind of ears does Thomas the Tank Engine have?

Engineers!

What's a civil engineer's favorite type of tea?

Structural integri-tea!

I have a sound engineer friend who’s Ukrainian

I have a Czech one too. Czech one too!

What do you call an architect who’s good at maths?

An engineer!

My friend is an audio engineer

I hear he's technically very sound!

What do you call a fear of overly engineered buildings?

A complex complex complex!

What do nuclear engineers grow in their gardens?

Uraniums!

Why is a robotics engineer never lonely?

Because he’s always making new friends!

My calculator stopped working mid-way through my engineering exam

I can’t count on it anymore!

A broken calculator

You might be an engineer if…

You destroy things just to see how they work!

How do you drive an engineer insane?

Make them watch as you fold up a road map the wrong way!

Engineers like to solve problems unless there are no problems

Then they’ll create their own!

How many software engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That’s a hardware issue

What do you give your favourite electrical engineer for their birthday?

Shorts!

Army pants

There are 10 types of people in this world

those who understand binary, and those who don't!

Two antennas got married

The wedding was lousy, but the reception was outstanding!

What is the definition of an engineer?

Someone who solves a problem you didn't know you had in a way you don't understand!

An optimist sees a glass half full, a pessimist sees it half empty

The engineer sees the glass as twice as big as it needs to be!

A Photon goes to a hotel and the receptionist asks if it needs any help with it's luggage

“No thanks,” says the Photon “I’m travelling light.”